Want to know a secret?
I LOVE feeling like Super Mom.
Like, no, you don't get it.
It's like an addiction, Mama.
I love to overschedule. Looking at my calendar and seeing things stacked back to back. "Story time at 10. Grocery shopping by 11. Playdate at 1. And a few more errands before being home to cook at 5."
Feels SO good.
Getting it all done.
In one big swoop.
Thursday is swim by 2 and I think I could squeeze in a morning playdate while we are out. She can do math in the car on the way.
Like, no, you don't get it.
It's like an addiction, Mama.
I love to overschedule. Looking at my calendar and seeing things stacked back to back. "Story time at 10. Grocery shopping by 11. Playdate at 1. And a few more errands before being home to cook at 5."
Feels SO good.
Getting it all done.
In one big swoop.
Thursday is swim by 2 and I think I could squeeze in a morning playdate while we are out. She can do math in the car on the way.
When I am nursing the baby in the Boba while unloading Groceries, I feel like I can do anything.
When I am holding one 20 pound baby in one arm and my 80 pound (9 year old) baby in the other, I feel like I'm the best Mom in the world.
I pride myself on being able to plan a CHEA event, lead a badge for AHG, and "whip up" a batch of homemade brownies for the church bakesale all in the same day.
I never say no to a volunteer position.
I have possesd a lot of honorary titles like "Stay-At-Home Mom," "Homeschooling Mom," "Explorer Leader," "CHEA President," and "Post Abortion Counselor," you know, just to name a few.
But since my Little S was born. I've been feeling convicted. Not lazy. Far from lazy. In fact, as she screamed the first few months away, I popped her in a carrier and nursed her while filing papers and sorting through Care Packs. I longed to clean my oh-so-filthy house as I rocked her back and forth.
All the while, I had no idea that God had been speaking to me. It was a long 6 months. Trying to accomplish everything I did when it was just Big S and me. I was drained. I had lost the battle. I gave my notice at the Center and began to commit to less. Then I found I had more time. Too much time. It HAD to be filled! With productive-type things. But what?
So I started to read my Bible again. Like truly read it and study it and commit to praying. And suddenly l started hearing God tell me to enjoy the girls because the season to come will be hard.
I had been convicted. Was the way I saw things right? Suddenly productive began to look different for me, for our family. Life began to take a different shape as I looked at it through a different lense.
Being home during the days did not feel like a waste. Admitting that I simply didn't have the time to take 100+ badge orders home didn't make me feel inadequate. And NOT planning a Pinterest birthday party gave me a high even better than my usual Super Mom high!
What is happening to me? I always scoffed at the posts and articles I saw where women took pride in not going over the top. "Lazy. Just lazy. Looking for any reason to make themselves feel better."
It has been a struggle. Seeing the purpose in "JUST" being home and wiping butts and teaching Big S. But through an eternity type lense, I'm seeing things differently and I'm understanding. We are all being prepared for what is to come, whatever it is. And this season, this is for us to get where we need to be.
So no more over commitment. One activity apiece. AHG for Big S and storytime for Little S twice a month-just to mix things up a bit. I do still want to plant an appreciation for reading in the girls. Playdate once a week. Relationship is important. No more "to do" lists a mile long. Now when we wake up each morning, our lists consists of a few things. Mommy: Bible and Clean OR Fold Laundry Samantha: Bible, Reading (Mom and Samantha Together), and Math OR some other interest like magic, cake decorating, etc. Sara: Read and Listen to Music. Anything else is extra. We play together. Study interests together. Go outside and explore or hang out in our hammocks. We spend a lot of time during the day reading seperately. I study my Bible and Bible history using different tools, such as the Story of the World series and my Bible Charts, Maps, and Timelines reference book. I have some Bible studies too that have helped me grow during this time. Samantha reads Nancy Drew or writes in her book. I'm sure those things are growing her too, but we also have a Mom and Daughter study we do while Little S sleeps.
Life is calmer.
And we are all happier.
We have all had the time to grow.
And I learned one of life's many lessons.
It is more important to accomplish a few meaningful things than it is to do many insignificant things.
I never say no to a volunteer position.
I have possesd a lot of honorary titles like "Stay-At-Home Mom," "Homeschooling Mom," "Explorer Leader," "CHEA President," and "Post Abortion Counselor," you know, just to name a few.
But since my Little S was born. I've been feeling convicted. Not lazy. Far from lazy. In fact, as she screamed the first few months away, I popped her in a carrier and nursed her while filing papers and sorting through Care Packs. I longed to clean my oh-so-filthy house as I rocked her back and forth.
All the while, I had no idea that God had been speaking to me. It was a long 6 months. Trying to accomplish everything I did when it was just Big S and me. I was drained. I had lost the battle. I gave my notice at the Center and began to commit to less. Then I found I had more time. Too much time. It HAD to be filled! With productive-type things. But what?
So I started to read my Bible again. Like truly read it and study it and commit to praying. And suddenly l started hearing God tell me to enjoy the girls because the season to come will be hard.
I had been convicted. Was the way I saw things right? Suddenly productive began to look different for me, for our family. Life began to take a different shape as I looked at it through a different lense.
Being home during the days did not feel like a waste. Admitting that I simply didn't have the time to take 100+ badge orders home didn't make me feel inadequate. And NOT planning a Pinterest birthday party gave me a high even better than my usual Super Mom high!
What is happening to me? I always scoffed at the posts and articles I saw where women took pride in not going over the top. "Lazy. Just lazy. Looking for any reason to make themselves feel better."
It has been a struggle. Seeing the purpose in "JUST" being home and wiping butts and teaching Big S. But through an eternity type lense, I'm seeing things differently and I'm understanding. We are all being prepared for what is to come, whatever it is. And this season, this is for us to get where we need to be.
So no more over commitment. One activity apiece. AHG for Big S and storytime for Little S twice a month-just to mix things up a bit. I do still want to plant an appreciation for reading in the girls. Playdate once a week. Relationship is important. No more "to do" lists a mile long. Now when we wake up each morning, our lists consists of a few things. Mommy: Bible and Clean OR Fold Laundry Samantha: Bible, Reading (Mom and Samantha Together), and Math OR some other interest like magic, cake decorating, etc. Sara: Read and Listen to Music. Anything else is extra. We play together. Study interests together. Go outside and explore or hang out in our hammocks. We spend a lot of time during the day reading seperately. I study my Bible and Bible history using different tools, such as the Story of the World series and my Bible Charts, Maps, and Timelines reference book. I have some Bible studies too that have helped me grow during this time. Samantha reads Nancy Drew or writes in her book. I'm sure those things are growing her too, but we also have a Mom and Daughter study we do while Little S sleeps.
Life is calmer.
And we are all happier.
We have all had the time to grow.
And I learned one of life's many lessons.
It is more important to accomplish a few meaningful things than it is to do many insignificant things.
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